Tuesday 10 March 2015

Guest Post: Dealing With Unfollowers

Everyone, please welcome Nicole Rose who has kindly agreed to guest post today for me. For ages I've looked up to her, so I'm really excited to see what she has to say!
So you're getting on your computer, pulling up Blogger (or any other social platform site you adore) with smile - until your eyes flicker to the side, and your expression melts into a frown. You could've sworn you had 53 readers. Now you only have 52.

I've experienced this multiple times over all aspects of my social media life. During the big Instagram spam account delete, I lost over 100 followers. This devastated me (even though they were inactive accounts anyway). And though that sort of touches on another topic and it doesn't quite apply to this, it still hurt. That's why I decided to organize this for you guys today. I know it's hard to lose followers - especially when you're feeling insecure, small or unheard. So please take your time in going through this post, and let me know in the comments if this was helpful. :)











It's not you. It's them.

This may seem like something people tell themselves to feel better about things, and it is. It truly is. But because of the truth that resonates through these words, it's calming. Someone unfollowed you. So what? It's truly their loss. You have great content to share, and if they can't see that, it's not your fault. They just didn't have the right set of eyes.

But this can only go so far. Up to a certain point, it may not just be them. It may be the connection you have.


You can't appeal to everyone.

Why do you think their are so many different categories and businesses and services offered around the same thing? Take graphic design for example. There are so many services out there that offer this, but people end up choosing one over the other. Why? Because of compatibility. The designer they choose may have the right work ethic or personality that appeals to them. They might have the right skill set or offerings. And there's always the factor of budget. Take all this into consideration and apply it to your website (or blog or social media account). Do you see what I'm saying now?

Some people just aren't compatible with others. And that's okay. Grand compatibility is boring anyway - enjoy your unique and small community. Because once your numbers start growing, you lose that personal touch and may begin to wander. Which leads to the next point.


Human beings are wanderers.

We stray from things all the time. Just watch the trends - one second, we're obsessing over Alex from Target, and in the next, we're fighting over the colors of a simple dress. It gets hectic. And due to this chaos, we're easily distracted. We wander. Which may be the case with your unfollower. He or she is heading down their own path, and you shouldn't take it personally when their path deviates from your own. That's just how life is.


Summary

All in all, the twisted gut feeling you got when you saw your numbers going down, is natural. Everyone has felt that. You're allowed to get upset over this. The best thing to do when you get this feeling is remind yourself of the points above. Take a deep breath, center yourself around your self-importance and remember that you're not defined by who follows you.

You're defined by who you choose to be.

Thank you for reading.



xx Nicole Rose


Nicole Rose is a teen blogger who believes creative expression and self-knowledge are important things every person needs to live a fulfilling life. She owns a web design shop and enjoys indulging herself with peanut butter cups as she pretends to get stuff done. She takes enjoyment in word experimentation, dancing to crazy teeny bopper tunes and laughing at her own jokes. Learn more about her here.

16 comments :

  1. This is most certainly a great thing to remember, but I also believe that it's definitely a wise idea to keep an eye on the numbers when they constantly keep going down. In that case, it might be time to either check in and see where you've gone wrong, re-adjust your blog's (or social media account's) focus, or figure out whether you're really appealing to your target audience. It's normal to lose a follower here and there, but if there's suddenly a steep decline, it's important to figure out why! ;)

    Wonderful post, love - you have such a good outlook on this. xx

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    1. You're right. I normally ignore my follower numbers, but I do notice when I have lost a few at the same time. I do wonder what goes wrong and when that happens, all you can do is look at what isn't working and think about how you're coming across.
      But remember, maybe your niche is changing and maybe your old readers aren't interested in the new things, but you'll always get new readers.

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  2. This was really helpful and meaningful!!! Thanks for posting such good advice!

    Chiara xo

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    1. Wasn't it just? Nicole Rose is my inspiration:)

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  3. What I don't understand is who has so much time to first follow a blog and then find that blog to unfollow it.Another thing I don't get is why do they follow in the first place itself are they confused? Or is someone holding a gun to their head forcing them to follow it to save their lives.
    People can't be pleased no matter anyone does for them you, me, anyone..we can never be pleased.Take Hobbit Battle of Five Armies for example, they made a small 200 page book into 3 epic movies with enough plots and twist which were missing in the book.The movies cover more about everything than the book and overall charisma of the movie is amazing still there are people who are criticizing it.So we should just accept that we can't please everyone all we can do is find the people can please and entertain them. :)

    Neal Kind
    Daily Diaries

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    1. It is confusing. But it might be to do with following back. When people are trying to get their blogs noticed, they go around and follow as many blogs as they can without properly reading them. But later on when they've discovered what blogging is about then they realise what they were doing wrong and don't care about your blog anymore!

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  4. cool post makes me more motivated and positive vibes

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    1. I'm glad it did. I also feel like that after reading Nicole Rose's blog.

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  5. Wow, I definitely know how this feels. A few days ago, I gained a follower on Bloglovin' who unfollowed me the next day. Maybe it's because I didn't follow back? Truth is, I'll never know. And that's one of the worst parts. But ultimately, I think it's more important to stay true to yourself and why you originally started blogging, instead of pandering to the crowd. This was a great post :).

    Precious @ Clockwork Desires

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    1. People like that properly just followed you hopping you'd visit back, but then realised you wouldn't and unfollowed. It was nothing to do with you. They properly didn't even look closely at your blog before following.
      Keep you chin up. You didn't need them. I'm sure they'll soon be replaced with true readers!

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  6. I've had people unfollow me many times, but I try often to not be fazed by it. Great post, Rose!

    xoxo Morning

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    1. Me too! It doesn't matter. So long as you're enjoying what you're doing.

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  7. These are great things to remember—it feels good to have an audience, and then losing it can be really hard. But, it's important to remember that you're not there for the people who aren't there, but the people who are; it's something important to remember, for sure. Great thoughts, Nicole!

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    1. I know! We feel losses more than we feel gains. We just need to keep our chins up though and keep going.

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  8. This is very true! Loved hearing this post from you guys!

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    1. I'm glad you liked it. Nicole has inspired me even more than she already did:)

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If posts are the brain of a blog...then comments are it's heart - Neal Kind